have you ever thought about me? how i felt? how it hurts?
keeping everything inside and not letting anyone see it so that they will not be sorry for me. and i tied everything together with a smile so that you will not see my pain.
Tuesday, 6 December 2011
Tied together with a smile.
you may look fine and happy from the outside. But, from the inside you yourself know how it felt like. For me, i wanna scream to the top of my lungs, scream for the things that i should do and to the things i should said. i hate to be blame and to be laugh at all the times. i want people to accept me for who i am not condemn me about the thing that i say and the things i do.
Wednesday, 1 June 2011
The future
The future.
People seems to have different version of their future. Most people said that their future are going to be as bright as the sun. But for me, I don't have any idea about my future. Of course, I've plan out my great future but what if something when wrong and it didn't turn out as I predicted. My world may collapse!
Saya mula terpikir tentang masa depan. Tentang kerja, tentang "bakal suami", tentang dunia, tentang keluarga,tentang kewangan dan semuanya. Saya selesa dengan kehidupan sekarang. Mungkin pada masa depan semua tak sama. Seriously, it freak me out.
Ramai nasihatkan supaya sambung belaja lagi. I want to,but not in the nearest time. I need more experience than a book can offer. Life is an adventure, live it, love it. I needed that so that the chapter in my life can be colourful and full of adventure and independence.
Maybe I'll change my mind again after this, who know right. I am a little bit unpredictable.
The other case of the future is about my practical. It will be 6 long month for that. Who know what will happen. It's half of my year has been taken away from me. Damn it! Tapi, untuk belaja pe salahnya. Takot jgak nk pegi ni. Wat2 berani jek padahal dlm hati dh takot gle.
The future.
The next minute of your life is the future. Anything can happen will the blink of an eyes. Sabtu depan, bab baru akan saya hadapi. Bab yang tiada siapa pun yang tau kecuali Allah. Ya Allah, permudahkan lah semua urusan ku.
Takot. Sumpah takot. A new chapter with a new environment. IOI Palm Garden you'll be seeing me this Saturday!
Wish me luck guys! :)
People seems to have different version of their future. Most people said that their future are going to be as bright as the sun. But for me, I don't have any idea about my future. Of course, I've plan out my great future but what if something when wrong and it didn't turn out as I predicted. My world may collapse!
Saya mula terpikir tentang masa depan. Tentang kerja, tentang "bakal suami", tentang dunia, tentang keluarga,tentang kewangan dan semuanya. Saya selesa dengan kehidupan sekarang. Mungkin pada masa depan semua tak sama. Seriously, it freak me out.
Ramai nasihatkan supaya sambung belaja lagi. I want to,but not in the nearest time. I need more experience than a book can offer. Life is an adventure, live it, love it. I needed that so that the chapter in my life can be colourful and full of adventure and independence.
Maybe I'll change my mind again after this, who know right. I am a little bit unpredictable.
The other case of the future is about my practical. It will be 6 long month for that. Who know what will happen. It's half of my year has been taken away from me. Damn it! Tapi, untuk belaja pe salahnya. Takot jgak nk pegi ni. Wat2 berani jek padahal dlm hati dh takot gle.
The future.
The next minute of your life is the future. Anything can happen will the blink of an eyes. Sabtu depan, bab baru akan saya hadapi. Bab yang tiada siapa pun yang tau kecuali Allah. Ya Allah, permudahkan lah semua urusan ku.
Takot. Sumpah takot. A new chapter with a new environment. IOI Palm Garden you'll be seeing me this Saturday!
Wish me luck guys! :)
Wednesday, 25 May 2011
my boyfriend.
Ramai yang xtau pasal dia ini. Even my friends pun terkejut tau kewujudan dia. Muncul dengan tetiba. I consider myself as a stone hearted person. Semua yang kenal pun cakap macam tu. But, it only take a person to change your world. And that person will be Husyaidi Hussein.
Before I meet him, I have a few rules about my future boyfriend is going to be:
Untuk sesiapa di luar yang tidak mengetahui atau memahami. Aidi is a life saver. U boleh marah dia, boleh merajuk dengan dia, mintak topup every week, u can be yourself totally, u can do anything with him. Yang penting, dia sabar. And that's why I love him. There's also a few thing la kan. Tak kan nak bagitau semua lak kot, melampau! Haha.
I never believe in love before. But now I do. It only take one person to change your world. Thanks to him, sekarang saya ada pendengar yang setia, penasihat yang baik dan juga kawan yang baik.
Before I meet him, I have a few rules about my future boyfriend is going to be:
1. He must be rich!
2. He must be cute.
Tu semua ciri-ciri idaman semua wanita. Admit it! But he is more valuable than money and a handsome guy. I don't need all that to make me happy. Seriously, money will run out sooner or later. What if your guy run out of his money? Nak tinggalkan ke? Handsome? So what? Muka handsome tak akan buat kte kenyang pun. Dah tua kedut gak ok.
Meanwhile, Aidi lebih kurang macam nie :
1. Crazy
2. Funny
Untuk sesiapa di luar yang tidak mengetahui atau memahami. Aidi is a life saver. U boleh marah dia, boleh merajuk dengan dia, mintak topup every week, u can be yourself totally, u can do anything with him. Yang penting, dia sabar. And that's why I love him. There's also a few thing la kan. Tak kan nak bagitau semua lak kot, melampau! Haha.
I never believe in love before. But now I do. It only take one person to change your world. Thanks to him, sekarang saya ada pendengar yang setia, penasihat yang baik dan juga kawan yang baik.
Friends.
People say, the old friends are the best possible friend that anyone could ever wish for. They may know you better than yourself, they can predict your reaction, they can understand your jokes, your body language and they can also be trusted with your most deepest secret. But, what happen when your old friend started to annoyed you?
Like, when you ask them to hang out after not seeing each other for so long and THEY started to change. They don't like your jokes, they don't bother with your secret, and they busy texting when you are telling your story. It annoyed me.
Mungkin, dieorang akan ckap yang kita sendiri yang berubah. I have a boyfriend now. So what? It doesn't change me at all. I'm still me. Mungkin 10% sikap berubah. 90% yang tinggal tu it still me. I'm changing for the better. Bukan berubah terus. Macam tengah hangout pun nak call ke, nak cakap pasal my boyfriend 24jam ke. NO! Grow up.
You with your new friends. Laughing, making fun with each other, make up nickname with each other. Fine, but when you are with me, don't talk about your new friend. I don't know them. And, kalau nak hangout dengan orang lain pun, tak payah la nak tipu. I'm a grown up. You can tell me. Duhhh!
Kawan lama atau baru, it's still the same. It all depends on you to divide the time.
Friends, we fight and we argue with each other. But, believe me. I cherish our memory together. You may say I'm living the past. But, we cannot be who we are today without the past.
Like, when you ask them to hang out after not seeing each other for so long and THEY started to change. They don't like your jokes, they don't bother with your secret, and they busy texting when you are telling your story. It annoyed me.
Mungkin, dieorang akan ckap yang kita sendiri yang berubah. I have a boyfriend now. So what? It doesn't change me at all. I'm still me. Mungkin 10% sikap berubah. 90% yang tinggal tu it still me. I'm changing for the better. Bukan berubah terus. Macam tengah hangout pun nak call ke, nak cakap pasal my boyfriend 24jam ke. NO! Grow up.
You with your new friends. Laughing, making fun with each other, make up nickname with each other. Fine, but when you are with me, don't talk about your new friend. I don't know them. And, kalau nak hangout dengan orang lain pun, tak payah la nak tipu. I'm a grown up. You can tell me. Duhhh!
Kawan lama atau baru, it's still the same. It all depends on you to divide the time.
Friends, we fight and we argue with each other. But, believe me. I cherish our memory together. You may say I'm living the past. But, we cannot be who we are today without the past.
'A Friend is someone who knows all about you and loves you anyway'
by Heather Tallent
Tuesday, 24 May 2011
First time.
Everyone will experience something for the first time in their life. Like myself for example, I am experiencing blogging for the first time in my 20 years of life! That's an achievement. But, the important thing about first time is that you will remember it for the rest of your life. For example, falling in love. You will remember your first love even after you are married. That's natural.
Tapi, dalam kes ni aku beza sikit. For the first time, aku akan rasa kehidupan bekerja. Bangun awal, datang kerja lambat, kena marah dengan manager, kena buli dengan staff senior, kena berpisah dengan my parents, tak leh tido lambat dan macam-macam lagi. And of course, that's my imagination jek. Mane la tau kan, tetiba btul pe yang aku ckap. Even the thought of going for practical freak me out. Ramai yang ckp, "soleha, mesti okeynya kat praktikal". Macam mane dieorg tau? Macam mane aku tetiba kena buang kerja ke, xda kawan ke, sakit ke? Siapa nak jaga nnt? I need my friends untuk meluahkan about everything, to laugh at a certain person, to share my joy and sadness.
The positive side about going for practical is that I'll gain experience from it. So, pape yang jadi pun kena hadapi dengan kesabaran. Mencari ilmu memang susah. Kena maki hamun ke, kena tengking ke. Hadapinya dengan senyuman. Nak maki pun, maki kat belakang dia. Bukan dia tau pun.
IOI Putrajaya. Here I come. And be nice to me please.
Thats all for today I guess.
xoxo.
Tapi, dalam kes ni aku beza sikit. For the first time, aku akan rasa kehidupan bekerja. Bangun awal, datang kerja lambat, kena marah dengan manager, kena buli dengan staff senior, kena berpisah dengan my parents, tak leh tido lambat dan macam-macam lagi. And of course, that's my imagination jek. Mane la tau kan, tetiba btul pe yang aku ckap. Even the thought of going for practical freak me out. Ramai yang ckp, "soleha, mesti okeynya kat praktikal". Macam mane dieorg tau? Macam mane aku tetiba kena buang kerja ke, xda kawan ke, sakit ke? Siapa nak jaga nnt? I need my friends untuk meluahkan about everything, to laugh at a certain person, to share my joy and sadness.
The positive side about going for practical is that I'll gain experience from it. So, pape yang jadi pun kena hadapi dengan kesabaran. Mencari ilmu memang susah. Kena maki hamun ke, kena tengking ke. Hadapinya dengan senyuman. Nak maki pun, maki kat belakang dia. Bukan dia tau pun.
IOI Putrajaya. Here I come. And be nice to me please.
Thats all for today I guess.
xoxo.
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